Another Saturday, another excuse to sweat in the pain cave while pretending to be outdoors. Today I had the honour (and the heavy breathing) of leading our mighty GGCC crew through the virtual streets of Watopia on Zwift. The menu: the legendary “Sugar Cookie” route — my all-time favorite, mostly because it sounds like a snack and not like a punishment. Big thanks to Jam for carrying the red beacon like a true lantern beare – well done, mate!
As always, we threw in some spicy sprints and finished with an optional mini-race, for everyone who still had a few watts hiding in their socks.

Through the jungle lead-in we rolled along at about 190W avg – a gentle warm-up, like stretching before a bar fight. Once the start on the flats kicked off, we cranked it up to 195–205W avg, because clearly our legs signed up for this voluntarily. Uphills demanded more power, of course (gravity doesn’t negotiate). The big boss fight was the last long climb, where I played shepherd and herded the group together at around 3,2-3,4W/kg, barking like a very sweaty sheepdog. Luckily the bypass back to the jungle was long enough to round up all the stragglers, so we got a proper, fair race start. Nobody gets left behind – except by the sprinters.

The coast road is an absolute blast. And no, it’s not only the all-out sprints – it’s also the sneaky flats and the leg-rattling bumps that make it a dentist appointment for your quads. At least the colorful scenery makes suffering look almost picturesque. Our sprinters had plenty to do and delivered like a well-paid courier service. Squeezing four brutal sprints into this short stretch of coast road is basically a hostage negotiation with your legs. Let’s see what the results have to say:

Congrats to R. Wilson and Hells500 for collecting the green jerseys – they clearly wanted a full wardrobe 🏆

With the sprints out of the way, it was time for the climb – because why rest when you can suffer uphill instead? The first short test came right after the desert, just to make sure our legs were properly confused. The real challenge was the first part of the Epic KOM up to the bypass. Fortunately we stuck together and even got a surprisingly relaxed ride along the bypass while preparing for the mini-race.
I set the fence to 2 seconds, and we rolled along the bypass like a well-behaved little train, minus the timetable. At the arch leading back to the jungle I shouted GO GO GO – and our racers shot off as if the finish line came with a free buffet.

Right after the start, one rider took off at full speed, as if he had secretly been hoarding watts since breakfast. Together with a very strong lady I managed to stay quite fast catching up to that rocket. After loosing my companion I stayed with that strong rider all the way to the finish line. And naturally, the last 400 m turned into an all-out, slightly desperate sprint, with everyone scraping the bottom of the tank – and some scraping the tank itself. Let’s check out the race results:

Congrats Hells500 🥇, Martin B. 🥈 and G. Piotrowska 🥉 on the podium – strong racing, guys. Champagne is on you, virtually.

Thanks to all for coming and having fun with us today – see you next Saturday for more cookies and cramps.

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